Sunday, May 9, 2010

What’s that in the shopping bag? A new self image!

New clothes are fun.  New clothes boost self esteem.  New clothes inspire. 

These reactions to new clothes transcend all ages.  Adults like new clothes because only babies need to replace their entire wardrobe every three months.  Children, surprisingly, enjoy new clothes too.  Just not as much for gifts. 

It’s obvious when someone gets new clothes.  Besides the tell tale new clothes smell and the perfect creases, the person is seen strutting.  They stand straighter with shoulders proudly thrown back.  They walk differently when it’s new shoes too.  After a few steps the person holds their foot out, however subtly, to admire the pristine shell covering it.

Stacy London and Clinton Kelly have fashion careers built around the successful advice to dress one’s body in it’s current state.  Don’t wait for some magic number on the scale or any other procrastinatory excuse.  The time to look good is now. 

Clinton Kelly has told women who want to lose weight that if they feel good about themselves now, they are more likely to do what it takes to lose the weight.  Truer words have never been spoken. 

My new clothes are sitting in a bag just waiting for me to knock out that new clothes smell with drippy, salty sweat rings.  My new clothes are workout clothes.  It’s not like I got a new power suit! 

These workout clothes are an epic change for me.  I have always loved working out.  Send me outside to play and I would rather lie in a lounge chair sunning myself.  But put me in a weight room, or in front of a TV with some routine workout video and I’m all over it.  I have aerobic steps, weights, a fitness ball, and a large rubber band with handles.  Run around the park?  Not interested.  Isolate myself in a room of torture devices and a video that never changes?  I’m there! 

Because this is how I choose to exercise . . . by the way, I also count standing in front of a wall while someone drives their car up to me stopping inches from my toes as exercise.  Whatever gets your heart rate up is the definition of cardiovascular exercise right?  Anyway, because my way of exercising doesn’t require me to see other people I have never owned anything close to workout attire. 

I lied.  In junior high I was in a dance class so my mom made me cotton spandex shorts and leotards to practice in.  The stretchy form fitting clothes were made with love but I never could dance.  Maybe that’s why I chose to block the experience from my memory. 

Any time I have worked out in public I have worn a pair of boxer shorts and an oversized t-shirt that would probably fit my husband’s 6’2” frame.  What I wear now to work out in, in the comfort of my own home, is a pair of boxer shorts from college that were too little then and a tank top that has shrunk to the point that my stomach spills out the bottom.  Sexy.  Oh, and I wear a nursing sports bra.  It’s not really a sports bra.  The saleslady told me it was what I could wear to bed so my nursing pads would stay in place.  And anyone who has ever nursed or slept with a nursing woman knows that at night the possibility for drowning in breast milk is really high. 

Needless to say, I throw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt to take my son next door on my neighbor’s carpool day.  I wouldn’t want to subject my neighbors to blindness from my endorphin laced sense of fashion at 8:00 am.   My new clothes will allow me to answer the door if needs be without having to find a robe or a large parka first. 

My new clothes make me look amazing.  Seriously.  Up until these miraculous stretchy cotton duds entered my life, I have tried to make peace with my stomach.  Like Kevin James, I want to work it until it stops shaking when I brush my teeth.  Then it’s all maintenance after that.  But then I put on these capri yoga pants.  They looked plain and unpromising on the hanger.  I stepped into those pants, pulled them up and my legs were immediately transformed into Greek goddess perfection.  And my stomach . . . what stomach? 

I thought I was being tricked by the mirror.  But when I showed my husband the clothes he got me for Mother’s Day (it takes a real man to think outside the chocolate box), he asked when I got so thin.  He’s seen me in all my glory and I have never looked that good!  Not even pre kids. 

All I can think about is what Clinton Kelly said about dressing your body now so you have the confidence to lose weight.  Holy that’s all I want to do!  Step into my magic pants with my real sports bras and performance tank top or t-shirt and use all my implements of exercise torture to melt before your very eyes. 

New clothes are so inspiring.  Have you had any life altering experiences with new clothes?


  1. Hi Tristan,

    New cloths are nice and I suppose that wearing them does tend to add to our confidence, at least for a little while. I gift myself a shopping spree each December where I buy mostly work cloths and maybe a pair of jeans or two. Other than that, I stay away from the malls -- at least in terms of shopping for myself.

    So you set-up your readers with a description of the transforming effect of your new workout attire, yet you've declined to include a picture. I see how it is. :)

    Feeling good about ourselves is the starting point of where we begin most everything else. That these new cloths give you a boost is great. And since you work out already, you're putting in the work, so you may as well enhance the experience.

    I watch the King of Queens, but I somehow missed that tooth brushing line. Very funny. :)


  2. Hi Ray,

    You wanted an actual before/after picture of me? I could never do that. It would ruin the illusion your imagination has created of what I look like! I would hate to think that my readers would see the pictures and think, "Oh honey, you need more than new clothes!"

    I am not a typical woman in the sense that I hate shopping. I always want new clothes but I hate shopping for myself. We usually make it a family affair. Only this time my husband asked me not to model the clothes I tried on at the store!

    The Kevin James comment was never on The King of Queens. A couple years ago there was a one hour special of his stand up comedy on TV. It was hilarious. The tooth brushing thing was him saying that he doesn't really want to lose weight. The stomach jiggling while brushing his teeth line has always stayed in my memory. He's a funny guy.

    Enjoy what you're wearing today.



Now that I've shared my thoughts, what are your thoughts?